It's funny, over the last few years I've found myself tangled in countless debates online about the decision to have, or not to have children. Truth be told, for a long stretch of time, I struggled to sympathize with those who argue against having children. In my eyes, parenthood was this profound, transformative experience, a cornerstone of human life.
Now, that's not to say I think anyone should be forced into parenthood. Far from it. Lord knows we have plenty of parents out there who perhaps shouldn't have ventured down that road in the first place. Yet, I've always felt, inherently, that parenthood was a good default, a pathway to a kind of meaning and enlightenment about life's beauty.
But lately, I've begun to see the other side of the argument. I've started to understand why some people resist the idea of bringing another human into this world. Some people simply don't believe their lives are worth replicating. Their experiences haven't been good, their struggles not worth passing on. They question why they should willingly expose a new, conscious being to a life that, in their view, is likely to be filled with hardship and pain.
This realization, however hard it was for me to grasp initially, made me reflect deeply on the challenge of finding meaning in life. Many of us try so hard to find it. We throw ourselves into religion, politics, music scenes, you name it. Yet despite these pursuits, sustainable, genuine meaning remains elusive for most. It's a sobering truth that many individuals spend their entire lives in a seemingly futile quest for a sense of purpose.
Take the hikikomori in Japan, for example, millions of young men retreating from life, becoming hermits. The only taste of romance they've ever had is with a virtual girlfriend, if any. It's a stark reminder of how difficult it can be to carve out a meaningful life, even in the midst of our highly interconnected world.
So, with this newfound understanding, I have to admit, it's not at all crazy to choose not to have a child. People have their reasons, and those reasons deserve respect. In the end, the choice to bring a new life into this world is deeply personal and should be respected as such.